Why do you say things to yourself that you'd never say to someone else you know and love? What is it that makes you so much more self-critical?
那些你从不对他人和爱的人说的话，为什么要对自己说？是什么让你对自己有这么多的自我批评？
The real question is: How do you shift to a more optimistic explanatory style so that you can stop beating yourself up with negative self-talk? Talk back to that voice and question it.
真正的问题是：你如何能转变为更加积极的解释型来让你停止使用消极的自我暗示打败自己？回击那种消极的声音，并且质问它。
这里有三步压制精神批判：
First, ask yourself:
首先问自己：
Are my thoughts driven by my rational or emotional mind?
我的想法是被我的理智思维驱使还是被我的情感思维驱使？
Are my thoughts a realistic representation of what's going on, of who I am and how capable I am of doing things?
我的想法是对正在发生的事情、我是谁以及我如何做这件事的真实重现吗？
What evidence do I have against and for my thinking?
我有什么证据来对抗消极想法并支持自己的想法呢？
When you start to rationalize the situation and try to emotionally detach, you start to realize that your frustration is speaking, not your ability.
Then, take yourself out of the situation:
然后，将你自己放在情境之外：
If my friend was saying this to themselves, what would I say to them to challenge their negative self-talk?
如果我的朋友对他们自己这样说，我应该对他们说些什么来挑战他们的消极自我暗示呢？
How would I tell them to reframe the situation in a more positive light?
我会如何告诉他们让他们以一个更加积极的眼光重新界定当前形势？
Taking yourself out of the situation enables you to think more creatively and see it from a different angle.
将自己放在情境之外能够让你更富有创造力地思考，并且从一个新的角度看待事物。
Last but not least, look at the bigger picture:
最后但同样重要的一点是，看到更大前景：
What's the worst thing that could happen here? How likely is it?
这里能发生的最坏的事情是什么？可能性有多高呢？
What's the best thing that could happen here?
这里能发生的最好的事情是什么？
Will this matter in five years time?
在未来的5年之内它还很重要吗？
You can challenge your negative self-talk by using these questions again and again. Once you start to hear the self-talk become more positive, you can start to minimize the use of the questions.
你可以通过重复地使用这些问题来挑战你的消极暗示。一旦你开始听到的自我暗示变成积极的，你就可以减少这些问题的使用。
It's important to remember not to beat yourself up for the negative self-talk you do, which will make it worse or start new negativity spirals! Instead, learn to become more aware of it, acknowledge it's there (rather than hating it), and start to question it.
最重要的是要记住，不要被你的消极暗示打败，这会让事情变得更糟，又或者新一轮的消极暗示急速上升！取而代之，学着更多的意识到消极暗示，承认它的存在（不要讨厌它），并且要质问它。
You will find yourself learning to talk to yourself in a way you would to your best friend. What better way is there to build a positive relationship with yourself?
你将会发现自己正学着以最好朋友的身份对自己说话。那么和你自己建立积极关系的好方法是什么呢？
